BTW, here is my new work signature file:
Thanks,
Nick Adams
Your Friendly QA Representative

/ / \/ / \ / \ You can do anything you set your mind to when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.

- posted by Turok @ 5:35 PM

 
[You *did* say you wanted to be a ninja, right?
Ninjas R us
- posted by Turok @ 4:41 PM

 
Overheard at lunch

...It's a fucking cat, man! It doesn't *have* a face. You can't tell what it's thinking!
- posted by Turok @ 2:04 PM

 
[Keeper?]
From: Nick's Girlfriend
To: Nick Adams
Subject: Mark Coleman

my brother and I talked about Mark Coleman, as my favorite UFL [Ed: UFC for Ultimate Fighting Championship, but hell, close enough] fighter,, and he said " I
like him too although he became a prowestling player...  did you know????
 
his favorite is Don Fly... (not sure the spelling)
he said he is quite old, but very "man" like
 
I wondered if I saw him on TV with you....
 
do you know him?  I am a bit currious to find him... do you think there is a tape I can rent?
 
XO

- posted by Turok @ 10:17 AM

 
[Sheet, sheet, sheet!]
Weird, man!
Another dream.

This time, i'm trying out to be a firefighter (easy, now ladies!). so i show up and they have us run foot races against each other. competition, what?

YOU! Down and to the left around the bar-b-que!
and YOU! Down and to the right around the pic-nic table!
GO!

what the hell is that? jerks.
note to mike: I am now awake
When i finally *do* get up and out of bed, i'm early to pick up my car-pool, so i go and get a coffee and bagel.
Wearin' my new shoes (Tigers) and feelin good (cause i already *had* coffee!). so i get the bagel and walk back to the car.
Squish.
Feeek. dog shit.
Son of Beech.
At this point I spend several minutes swearing loudly, scraping my shoe on everything in sight, and cursing all dog owners. i paused for a minute and thought about if i really meant that or not, turns out i did. sorry baby.

So. just so you know i tend to keep "stuff" in the car. stuff like pens, extra propane bottles that might be empty, a pair of tweesers (how the hell do you spell tweaser?) and some other stuff. maybe an old parking ticket, or a map of the state where i live.

This time it's cool though cause i had actually left a roll of paper towels in the back seat! score x 3!!!
No problem, open door, look in back seat, no paper towel roll. damn! i gave this guy a ride home and he threw it in the back, the back where the rain comes in. what, you don't understand what 'the back' means? well, i'll send ya a picture. the point is that the roll of paper towels is wet, but hell, i use them anyway. i have dog shit on my shoe after all.

My new shoes have some kind of intricate pattern on the bottom, designed especially so that dog shit can hide in the little nooks and crannies. i'm still really mad at dog owners at this point of my day.

I clean off the shoe pretty well. but i don't know if you remember your last encounter with dog shit, but "pretty good" really does not go as far as it does in other areas. visibly it looks clean. i figure i was ok.

Back in the car and i'm gonna eat my bagel (yeah we are not that far along right). but i can smell the dog shit, now in the car; realize that i had just cleaned dog shit off my shoes and just lost all interest in eating anything.

And the stench of dog shit all the way to work. my car-pool did not seem to notice. maybe it's the flu symptoms going around.

Talking with car-pool guy and the sun comes out, first time in like a week and a go for my sunglasses that were in the jacket pocket. pull them out and it looks like some kind of modern art piece, all twisted and crooked i would call it "mocking augen moral needs." but no. they were just fucking bent.

In to work and going to brush teeth. tooth brush: awol. is it just time to turn around and go home? i mean the tooth brush was in my other pocket, for real, you can't deny. so it's just gone for good. resigned. and your cube smells like dog shit all day and you need to brush your teeth, man.

Later i find the tooth brush on the floor and i run over and pick it up off the floor, beaming! i say out loud "all right!" like my day is actually having some kind of redemption! i look up and see the admistrative assistant looking at me like i was nuts.
Like who gets excited by finding an old nasty tooth brush on the floor? i mean i don't even *care* if it *is* yours. and in that look, i kinda agreed with her. but secretly i was still stoked.
score x 3!!!


- posted by Turok @ 11:50 AM

 
I had this weird dream about driving through a highway in the desert and there was trash everywhere. you could not get away from it. plastic bags blowing around everywhere. garbage.
- posted by Turok @ 3:57 PM